It’s hard when u like someone for such a long time and u don’t have the guts to tell that person that u like or love him/her.
Well, this is what happening to me!
I like someone since I was in college. It was some sort like love at first sight. From the very moments I saw that person, I was attracted to that person (whom I named as “A”). A was one of my classmate in college. He’s kind of a quite student in the class but with a brilliant brain. He often gets high marks for tests or quizzes and that makes me even more into him. A guy with a brain! Ha-ha…
Then I started to sms-ing him. I’ve got his number from himself. We changed our phone number with one another. And since then I never stop from messaging him but it was not often but only a few when it is needed.
After a few years, he left the college and pursues his studies in a higher institution and I was felt left behind. I couldn’t see the face that always brightens up my days that encourage me to study hard and achieve my goal. I was so sad. However, I still contact him. We contacted with each other through email or phone messaging services.
One of his messages which never erased in my heart and mind was when he said that we will be in the same faculty and instead will attach to the same orientation week. I was as high…as high as in cloud nine. His words make me even keener to study and finished up my workload. I don’t want to leave the opportunity to meet him and be with him. No I don’t want to!
So here I am now…at the same university as his. Taking the very same courses but just a few different especially in his major’s and mine. Even though it was 2 branches of studies, but so much so, it is related to one another. After being almost 6 years having crushed on him... I would says that yes I do like him sincerely. The reasons? Well I don’t have reasons for that. And don’t ask me why.
My friends’ keeps on telling me that I should tell him about what I feel, but I don’t have the gut to say it out loud. I preferably wanted to keep it in my heart and let only I know the truth, but my friends never understands it. Instead, they force me to confess to him but I don’t!
The reasons why I don’t want to confess is that, I don’t want to be hurt by what will happen if I told him about this. It’s hard to accept the rejection and even more it is hard for me then. If he rejects it, I would be embarrassed throughout of my studies years or I would lost him forever by ways which he will keep distance from me and that may cause me to lose a dearly friend. No I don’t want to take that risk.
So to play safe, I would rather be like this instead of confessing to him that I like him because I couldn’t bear the circumstances after the confession takes place. Either it would be a positive response or simply a negative response. Whose know rite, but still I don’t want to takes that risk! Let me be what I wanted it to be. Like Shakespeare said on one of his play, “To be or not to be”.
“A” I like and fall into you since I first saw your face. Thanks for making my days here very enjoyable and appreciated. Though we’re not that close, but your presence was enough for me. I wouldn’t demand anything high from someone who will never be mine I guess…so, instead of mumbling this all day long, I would rather to say that I do like someone and him fascinating me in so many ways.
From you, I learn how to learn and have the vision of my life.
